Boy Sets Fire

Wonka: So you guys make up Boys to Men?

Boy Sets Fire: Yeah, we are Boys to Men.

Wonka: Can you state your names?

BSF: Nathan, Darrell, Matt, Josh, Chad.

Wonka: So how long have you guys been an accapello group?

BSF: 2 ½, 3 ½ years. Something like that.

Wonka: What aer some of the bigger acts that you guys have been on tour with?

BSF: The Enkindels. We played shows with Fugazi, Snapcase, Avail. Hey look its Fred our roadie!

Wonka: Hey Fred! How does it feel being the roadie for Boys to Men?

Fred: It’s a lot of fun!

BSF: It’s not Fred, It’s Frank! (Correcting one of the members in the band)

BSF: Sorry I’m a stickler for names with more than 3 letters.

Frank: It’s OK were still getting to know each other.

Wonka: I heard that you guys once went out with Ink and Dagger and painted your faces too?

BSF: (collectively) NO! Never happened. The Enkendels did that but we didnt. Were not dumb! Well, we are, but not that dumb.

Wonka: Do you guys hate those comparisons you always get to Korn?

BSF: no, what are you insane? What is your problem? Well I can see the similarity with Darrel rapping all the time. OK, OK! I think you’re just making fun of us.

Wonka: No we just didn’t know that you guys were playing tonight.

BSF: Interviews over then...Let’s go guys!

Wonka: Wait, Wait...Band History?

BSF: All right Josh and Chad were sitting on the porch and Chad was like, I aint got a life, wanna start a band? And josh was like I want to be in a band that does stuff, are you willing to make that commitment? Chad said sure I’ll kill my wife, I’ll kill my dogs and we’ll go on tour. Hey, hey, who’s talking here? So anyway, they called Nathan, and Nathan called me and we had this horrible drummer that Josh brought in named Tony, h was nice but he didn’t like Chad, so we kicked him out. So I was working with Matt at a dining hall and we thought Matt was pretty fat, and we asked him if he wanted to be part of the big time and uh...that’s how it all came to be.

Wonka: Which one of the Mighty Heroes would you want in the band?

BSF: who the hell are the Mighty Heroes?

Wonka: Diaperman, Ropeman? It was a cartoon.

BSF: What like 40 years ago? I think we’re leaving now. See ya later Fred. Yeah Fred, bye Freddie.

Wonka: So how emo are you guys?

BSF: Oh my god! (Crying hysterically). We just burst into tears. Ummm...45%emo? We are so emo that when we sit around the house...we sit around the house. Well I think we’d be full of emo but we don’t dress very well. We don’t have the fashion down. We’re so emo, we all have the same mom.

Wonka: Well he’s got a sweater on? (Pointing at Nathan’s nice sweater)

BSF: That has nothing to do with emo, he’s gay!

Wonka: Do you guys huddle around before shows and hug and kiss like the BossTones do?

BSF: No! But Matt’s little brother was in a band that did that.

Wonka: How’s your big record deal with Initial Records?

BSF: Well ya know, a label, a label is a label. You’re never gonna find the perfect label. We hear that Andy’s got a cute penis but he won’t show us. He’s hung like a fucking coke can. He’s very honest!

Wonka: I’m hung like a tree!

BSF: oh yeah, what a tiny little root (hahaha)

Wonka: We heard that line in a song this morning. The Surf Gunz! They do a Boys to Men cover. You guys would love them.

BSF: We don’t like guys that cover our stuff. Yeah those guys on MTV who cover our shit! We don’t like that! “It’s so hard to say good bye to yesterday” (Sung in accapello. Everyone starts screaming “Stop. Stop. Stop!” and the interview ends)